Yvonne

Mother’s Day is an amazing time of year. It’s a celebration of women, true sisterhood. I’m blessed to have one of the many leaders in the pack as a mother. All of my success I owe to my mom. She has been my constant supporter, encourager, friend, prayer warrior, etc. Most of all, she loves me unconditionally. She loves me when I leave the dishes in the sink. Yes, I know. I’m 25 years old, and I’m still leaving dishes in the sink. Or when I wash the ice trays after they’re empty. She hates it when I do that. She loves me when I stomp up and down the stairs cussing about a poor grade or worrying about a friend in danger. She loves me when I let the dog get on her bed without permission, or when I tell people her favorite song is “I Wanna Sex You Up” from Color Me Badd. Sssh...don’t tell! LOL!

The point is my mother stands with me no matter what. While she gave up a career in opera, she refuses to allow me to do the same. As a matter of fact, on Mother’s Day this year, she spent the entire day building up her son. Yes, I know. Right? It’s her day, and she still finds time to encourage me. There are moments where Facebook can prove deadly based on likes. We as people have an innate need to be liked. When you see your peers “living it up” on social media you sometimes find yourself in a sunken place. You begin to doubt yourself. You lose sight of what’s important. You forget your purpose. Yvonne reminds me of that purpose. Yvonne pushes me harder than anyone else on this planet because she believes in my worth. Yvonne gave me an extremely long name because she wanted it to be regal, dignified. She describes it as the “name of a king.” LOL! Yvonne found me when I was sexually molested at 5, and immediately jumped into “mama bear” mode. She enrolled me into counseling. Yes, a “sistah” took her 5 year old black son to a therapist. Yvonne taught me to hold my head up high. She taught me how to change a tire. She taught me how to make the best mac & cheese in the land of Buffalo. Yvonne taught me that a mental illness isn’t something to be ashamed of. Yvonne taught me to love Christ with all of my heart. But most of all, Yvonne taught me to be myself. She didn’t just teach me how to love or how to forgive others. She taught me how to love and forgive myself.

Often in life, most people will say that we find ourselves stuck in emotional baggage because we haven’t forgiven the perpetrators in our lives. I disagree. I think that’s true to an extent, but the real issue is we haven’t forgiven ourselves. Looking at yourself in a mirror is the hardest thing to do. It forces you to look at yourself, and that’s not an easy task. However, when you master it the reward is remarkable. Lalah Hathaway’s single “Mirror” speaks fluently on this issue. In the song she sings “sometimes you have to make the mirror your best friend and maybe then you’ll find some peace within.”

As I come to a close, I salute you Yvonne for raising your Black American King (BAK). I love you! I hope everyone had a wonderful Mother’s Day weekend.

Sincerely,

Robert “Bobby” Henry

Pictured: L to R (Me & Yvonne, Circa 1996)